Tag Archives: sarcasm

Things You Wish Report Cards Would Say

Third quarter report cards are out in Charleston County, SC.  Teachers get a comment section on the computerized form with far fewer than 140 characters (Twitter’s limit).  They resort to banalities like,

  • a pleasure to teach, or
  • good effort

Wouldn’t it be refreshing (horrifying?) if teachers said what they’re really thinking.  Here’s a starter pack of ideas:

  • did you drop this baby on its head at birth?
  • needs to learn to say, “do you want fries with that”
  • needs help, lots of it
  • can’t recommend your child too highly
  • bright, but still eats crayons in 10th grade
  • the only child left behind
  • breaths in and out with proficency, or
  • this grade was a gift

Got better ideas?  Post them here or on Twitter or Facebook.